


By Your Side

by FernStone



Series: In The North [3]
Category: His Dark Materials (TV), His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
Genre: Canon Compliant, Dad Lord Asriel, Dadriel, Family Fluff, Father-Daughter Relationship, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Parent-Child Relationship, Teaching
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-11
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:02:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22205290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FernStone/pseuds/FernStone
Summary: A nightmare, attempted tuition and softness by the fire.A tale of Lord Asriel and Lyra in the North.
Relationships: Lord Asriel & Lyra Belacqua
Series: In The North [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1600990
Comments: 16
Kudos: 46





	By Your Side

**Author's Note:**

> A sequel to [A Chance for Change](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22043032) and [The Snow Falls, Gentle but Harsh](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22116448) but can be read as a stand alone. But yes it's Saturday which means I'm legally obliged to post Dadriel 
> 
> Oops I wrote another one. I just can't stop lmao and I got a few requests / ideas so here this is. Might be a fourth who knows. 
> 
> Also comments are really appreciated if you have the time! I'm ngl I'm really hating my writing rn aha thanks self confidence. That doesn't mean you have to! Every read and kudos is also appreciated. 
> 
> Also uh I've been doing a whole bunch of other HDM things? If you're interested check out my Lyra cosplay on my [Instagram](https://www.instagram.com/p/B7L0XohHBoh/?igshid=r9upu6ad3ate) and [tumblr](https://fern-stone.tumblr.com/post/190169387284/coming-out-from-my-year-of-inactivity-to-dump-my) 👀 also uh feel free to hmu on either to scream about HDM ty. Also I drew someee [HDM sticker designs](https://fern-stone.tumblr.com/post/190187984974/his-dark-materials-stickers-i-drew-right-after) like a while back cause why would I just do one hobby for this show when I could do them all lmao. Also may or may not went to cosplay Marisa and Asriel too oop someone stop me. Also I know yall don't care but I have no one to talk to about HDM so i rant in my fic notes 
> 
> Also I uh considered making a his dark materials discord but... Idk how I'd find people to join so probably not an idea I'll pursue. Or I might and just be lonely but organised xD
> 
> Enough if that stuff enjoy the fic!

A few nights after Lyra had snuck outside, Asriel was taking a well deserved rest. His daughter was already in bed, exhausted from their trip the night before, and Thorold had retired for the evening. It was just him and Stelmaria in front of the fire enjoying each others company and a good book. It had been quite the while since he'd had a chance to do this. He had chosen to invite Lyra here and he was glad he had, but that didn't mean he didn't miss the larger amounts of time alone previously. Nothing could change his solitary nature. Not completely.

He sipped on his wine, completely relaxed, book in one hand and gently petting Stelmaria with the other. Her gentle purrs, low and for his ears only, added to his comfort. It had been a while since had just had time like this.

Then his breath caught in his throat. Something was wrong. It was Stel who had noticed, head shot up and panicked thoughts filtering to him.

"The girl. Something's wrong."

Asriel didn't question how she knew, understanding there was a bond between Daemons as they grew closer. They understood each other. Instead he strode to Lyra's room and flung the door open.

She was tossing and turning, whimpers escaping from her lips as she twisted herself in her sheets. Pan was pressed against her as an ermine with small claws digging against her chest.

A nightmare.

"Lyra," Asriel whispered, urgently. Then again, louder. "Lyra, you need to wake up. It's just a dream."

She let out a slight cry and he rushed to her bed, sitting down and giving her a light shake. Slowly her eyes fluttered open and she looked up at him with heaving breaths.

"Father?" she choked out, cheek wet with still running tears.

"Sh, it's alright, Lyra, I'm here," he responded softly, wiping the tears away from her cheek. "I'm here for you, it was just a dream."

She was shaking, breathing still coming out in short gasps and eyes wide with fear. He gently, cautiously, drew her into his arms. Stel joined him in the bed to curl around them and Pan.

"Father, I," she shook her head, burrowing it into him. He held her tighter.

"Its okay now, I'm here for you. I'll protect you."

He let her sob into his arms, her Daemon pressed close to Stelmaria. He gently rubbed her back and ran a hand through her hair. He didn't push but offered comfort.

"I was back in the cave," she sniffed, when she'd finally stopped shaking and crying. "I was stuck and it was so dark. I was so scared. We kept trying to get out, screaming for help, but no one heard us. Then the snow fell and separated us and oh it was so terrible! It felt as if my heart from ripped out from my chest. I never want to be separated from Pan, ever."

He whined, leaping into her slightly outstretched arms. They clung to each other and Asriel hugged her closer. For such a young girl to have such a vivid nightmare... It was horrible to see. He hated seeing her like this.

"No one will separate you two," he spoke firmly, hands soft as he ran a circle on her back. "And you will never, ever get stuck again. I will protect you from that and I will always save you, if I must."

"I know," she gave a weak smile, head resting against him. "It was just a silly dream."

"Most dreams are based in reality," he admonished. He wouldn't let her reduce the fear and pain of what she'd gone through. He knew how terrible nightmares could be, for he been through many of his own. They were horrifying even for an adult, nevermind a girl her age. "It is okay to be scared. I cannot make the nightmares go away, but I can be here to help you through them and I will always protect you."

"I trust you," she mumbled, eyes already heavy lidded from sleepiness. He was glad to see she'd relaxed a bit now.

"Good," he smiled softly. "Now try to get back to sleep." She whimpered slightly as he removed her from his hug, tucking her back in. He gently ran his thumb across her brow. "I'll stay with you until your asleep."

She nodded, eyes already closed.

And he kept to his word, staying in her room until her breathing evened and she was in a deep sleep.

-

It was when they were stuck inside due to another storm that Asriel realised he should be continuing Lyra's tuition. Well, it was actually Thorold who pointed it out. Asriel had been too caught up in his research and spending time with his daughter to even think about the fact she wasn't leaning what she should. Learning about his research was one thing, but she was only eleven. There were plenty of other things she had to learn.

And he knew how sporadic her lessons had been back in Jordan, for the Master had reported to him. They always needed someone to capture her and even then most scholars gave up on teaching after only a few days. That, or Lyra evaded them and never even made it to the lesson.

Well here, there was nowhere she could run to here.

Still, he wasn't under the illusion that it would be easy. He'd told her his plan to teach her during breakfast and her face had twisted into a strong grimace. He'd had other things to do since then and hadn't heard a peep from her. Or seen her.

Out of sight out of mind, was probably what she was hoping.

"Where is she?" he asked Stelmaria, who had been paying attention to the light footsteps avoiding him with much more ease than he could.

"Her room, I believe," she rumbled, tail swishing as she padded in that direction. He followed with a light chuckle. As much as neither would admit it openly, they were truly beginning to enjoy the company of Lyra and Pan. It was nice to have someone full of life around them. She was smart, too, and so very inquisitive. Perhaps a little too much at points.

"Lyra," he spoke softly as he opened her door. She was at her desk, scribbling furiously on a spare map of the area he'd been giving. He couldn't make out the mess of lines she'd drawn, apart from the crude sketch of an armoured bear in one corner.

"Father!" Lyra perked up, wide grin splitting her lips and dark eyes bright with excitement. He noticed her slightly tense muscle and Pan's Arctic fox form, which he rarely stayed in when indoors. His lips curved upwards. "I was just drawing routes of where I want to go when we can next go out."

"Oh really?" Asriel drawled, feigning surprise and intense interest as he came to her side. "Why don't you show me?"

Lyra's face lit up and he couldn't help but ruffle her hair affectionately. He still couldn't make out the scribbles that she claimed to be walking routes or half of her incessant babbling, but it was nice to see her getting to excited. And it meant she didn't even think about the hand he rested on her shoulder.

"Well, you certainly have things planned out," a teasing smile curved his lips. "Since you're done with all that-" he paused for dramatic effect, grin widening as her eyes did. "How about we start your lessons for the day."

Her large eyes, so soft and full of emotion, instantly turned pleading. Pan joined her, making himself as cute as he could as they both stared up at him. "Can't we not, father? I don't really need to learn anything that e'nt useful here."

It would have been hard to resist but Asriel was a man with an iron will. And he'd resisted her mother, many times. Lyra was much younger and so much worse at manipulating than her (something he was glad for). "No, Lyra. Sometimes you must learn things you don't want to."

Her eyes narrowed, as if calculating the odds of convincing him otherwise. But Asriel was absolutely set in this. And from what he remembered of his questioning of Lyra whenever he visited, she was missing a lot of the foundations. She'd need those of she properly wanted to assist him.

Mind made up, Lyra bolted for the door. Pan nimbly dodged Stelmaria's leap at him, rolling out of the way and after her. But Asriel's grip on her shoulder had slowed her down and he was prepared. Two large steps for her many small ones and he'd grabbed her around the waist.

Pan growled at him, jumping up as if to dislodge him. Stelmaria promptly put a paw on his back, gently pinning him down. Lyra struggled and screamed at him as if she were some wild animal about to be put into captivity. In a way she was, he supposed.

"I can see why you rarely had lessons," he chuckled once she'd ran out of energy. Stelmaria released Pan, who let out a quiet whine that was almost definitely to garner sympathy. The pout on Lyra's lips and slightly teary eyes were the same. "But I'm not like the scholars, Lyra, I'm quite happy to catch you every time." He lowered his head towards her talk in a lower, more threatening tone. "I can so very easily break your arm. Or leg, so you cannot run away."

He wouldn't, of course, but he wasn't above using a threat or lie to force her into education. It was for her own good. And anyway, it wasn't his fault his daughter was so stubborn he was forced to physically catch her just to try and teach her. He didn't even plan to do it for more than a few hours! For someone so interested in learning about his research, she really had no understand of how much background knowledge she may need. The boring stuff that everyone had to learn to get to Asriel's level.

"You wouldn't," Lyra stared up at him with wide eyes, wider still as Stelmaria emitted a low growl (entirely for effect).

"I will, if you continue to be so stubborn," Asriel's smile was borderline deadly, a look he was so often it was easy to fake. By her nod, eyes fiery but a slight tremble in her lip, he knew she believed him. "But, if you're a good girl and pay attention we can go on a multiple day trip once the storm cleared up."

Her eyes lit up, grin breaking through the pout that had been sitting on her trembling lips. The threats from her were immediately forgotten for the promise of something so sweet, the exploration she so desperately wanted.

Maybe he should have done that first and avoided the threats altogether. Well, she didn't seem to resent him for that. When he'd begun caring for that he didn't know. She wheedled her way into his cold, solitary heart awfully quickly. Before he never would've cared about the thought of scaring her with a threat.

"Do you promise?" her bright voice broke through his thoughts and he shook them away. Not something to worry about.

"You have my word," he smiled, a certain gentleness falling into his eyes. He had missed out so much by ignoring that bright smile and fountain of energy for so long. "Now, let's get to work, shall we?"

-

Lyra found that learning from her father wasn't as boring as she'd expected.

She'd always hated her lessons in Jordan college and ran from them whenever she could. It took a lot for people to catch her and drag her, kicking and screaming, to some scholar. The scholar changed regularly because they always got sick of teaching her. She made them feeling sick of it.

But her father managed to make it interesting. She didn't understand how but suddenly she could pay attention to lessons about electrons and protons and all that. Texts that she shunned and scoffed at were suddenly wonderful tales when read out by him.

And he had a fire in his eyes as he taught her, a thirst for knowledge that pushed across into sharing that. He was enjoying it and wanted her to learn.

It made Lyra want to try harder. She wanted him to be proud of her.

It didn't mean she wasn't incredibly drained by the time they finished in the evening. There was far to much being stuffed into her brain and she knew most of it would have left by the next day.

"I don't think I can read another word," she groaned, leaning back in her chair.

Asriel chuckled. "We'll stop here for tonight. I don't want to push you too far."

"No, or I shall never be able to read books again!" Lyra declared, standing up far too quickly now that she'd been freed.

"You did well," her father commented, tidying up the mess of books and paper she'd left on the desk. "You're a fast learner when you put your mind to it."

Lyra puffed her chest out, glowing at the praise. Praise from her father! She couldn't believe it. Once upon a time she never would've even dreamt of getting praised by him. It felt even better than she could've thought it would.

He believed in her. She would have to prove that he was right to have faith in her.

"I'll keep trying hard!" she declared, stance stiff as she held a fist to her heart. "I won't let you down, Father. I'll catch up to you in now time."

He chuckled. "I'm sure you will."

-

They were all cold and tired when they made it back from their three days expedition, spent taking photos of the aurora and measuring something Lyra didn't quite understand. But she had the time of her life and that was the important thing. She couldn't imagine wanting to be anywhere but here, underneath the clear night sky and surrounded by endless white. She was almost disappointed when they had to return. But she knew they'd go back out again.

Stelmaria made a beeline for the crackling fire in the living room, lit by Thorold for their return. She let out a content purr as she stretched out in front of it. Lyra couldn't help but giggle as Pan copied her, remaining as an Arctic fox and flopping himself on top of her. She gave him a look, as if she was done with his nonsense, before staring back at the fire.

Lyra watched them with a slight smile, not quite sure what to do herself. Part of her just want to sleep but another part wants to join. She also wants to go right back out into the snow.

"Here," her father places a mug of warm chocolatl in her hands. The heat hurts her frigid fingers at first but as she nurses it they begin to thaw. "Go warm up by the fire, Lyra."

She nodded, going to sit down with the two Daemon's. The warmth of the fire and drink in her hands spread through her, as Stelmaria shifted to curl around behind her. Pan flopped half is body into her lap and she laughed, scratching behind his ears.

It was so nice to relax after a long day outside in the cold. Lyra hadn't even realised how cold she was until she was in front of the fire, the flickering heat prickling at her exposed cheeks and fighting through the lingering cold. It muffled her energy and made her feel so tired but so safe.

She sharply glanced to the side as there was movement, tilting her head in confusion as her father sat down beside her. She had expected him to slink off to his work after having spent so long with her. Stelmaria by the fire was less of a surprise, for the snow leopard seemed to enjoy basking in the warmth, but her father? She hadn't thought he would join them.

Perhaps once upon a time he wouldn't have. Even she, as oblivious as she could be sometimes, had noticed the change in him towards her. He didn't ignore her anymore.

"There's nothing better than sitting in front of the fire with a warm drink after an outing," he drawled, slight crinkle in the corner of his eyes. Lyra wondered when they had stopped looking at her with distaste and turned so soft.

"Mmm, it is nice," she mumbled into her drink, suddenly feeling embarrassed under his gaze. As if it had suddenly just done on her that he was really paying attention to her. In a way, it had. She had taken for granted a lot of what he'd done since she'd joined him here without truly thinking about. Without considering how he seemed to genuinely care for now.

"Truly," he nodded, hand running through Stelmaria's fur. "I think the pictures we took are the ones. They contain what I'm looking for, I'm sure of it."

"Dust?" Lyra breathed, tilting her head up to him with widened eyes.

"The very same," his smile widened, a hint of a predatory glint within it that she'd witnessed a few times while observing his research. A thirst for knowledge.

Lyra didn't really understand what dust was, as much as it had been explained to her by her father. But she knew it was important but nothing else about it made sense. But it seemed to her that no one truly understood it.

"What will the photos show us?"

"I don't know for certain," father inclined his head. "But I know what I am hoping for. We shall have to look at the pictures."

"Can we do it tonight?" Lyra's eyes lit up with excitement, breath caught in her throat. She so desperately wanted to see. Then she would understand his research.

"No, child, it is too late," he chuckled, brushing her hair away from her face. "But if they are what I hope, we will begin the journey back to Oxford tomorrow."

Lyra's smile faltered. He hadn't mentioned that they would be going back to her. She'd had been so caught up in the moment of it all that she hadn't considered it a possibility. Pan's head had shot up at her discomfort, eyes disconcertingly wide as he glanced at Asriel then rubbed against her hand. "Can't I stay here?"

"Why would you want to do that?" Her father gave her a strange look.

"Well I really like it here, y'know with all the adventuring and that."

"Don't you want to see your friend again, what as his name? Ron or Roddy or something."

"Roger," she corrected, forcing a smile even as a shaking hand gripped Pan. "Yes, I do. I miss him. But..." Her voice shook, a hint of vulnerability in the way she looked away and her voice quietened. "I don't want to go back cause you'll leave me behind. I en't okay with that."

Asriel's brow furrowed and he slowly shook his head. His hand carefully gripped her shoulder. "Lyra, do you really believe I'd abandon you."

"No?" she couldn't help the uncertainty. He'd disappointed her before even if things now were... Different.

He sighed softly, muttering something for Stelmaria before shifting closer to her. His arm moved to wrap around her shoulder and his voice grew softer. "I know I haven't always treated you as a father should. In fact, I wasn't even a father to you. But you said, nights ago, that you trusted me. So trust me. I will not leave you in Oxford. You will be coming back North with me once I have secured the last funding you need."

Lyra nodded, slowly relaxing again. She believed him, she really did. He had no reason to lie to her about this.

"It will be good for you to be back for a bit, as well. It is important to spend time with others and you can't do that here. I want you to have a childhood, Lyra."

"I can, here," she retorted fiercely. The last thing she wanted was for him to backtrack on his promise.

He laughed, kindly, at her ferocity. "I know. I'm not going to leave you there so you can run around with other children. I'm just going to make sure we return for long enough so you have plenty of time to enjoy yourself."

"Oh," Lyra blinked, smile sparking back to life as warmth spread through her. "Maybe we could bring Roger here, so I could also have a friend! I'm sure he'd love to. He could help Thorold! He is my best friend."

"Perhaps we can," a smile flickered on the corners of her father's lips. "But we can discuss that tomorrow. Its getting late and your drink is getting cold."

Lyra looked down at the drink in shock, because it was almost cold. She drank it quickly before lying against her Father's side. He didn't move as she did so, still sipping his coffee with the arm that wasn't around her. He didn't seem bothered by the closeness, the sentimentality of what they'd discussed.

Yes, he'd definitely changed. Lyra was glad. She gave a content smile. This really was perfect.

It was her, snuggled against her fathers side with Pan and Stelmaria wrapped around her, that she fell asleep.


End file.
